Honoring Fathers

My father John in 1985

On this Father’s Day, I remember and pray for my father John who left us on January 4, 2002, to be joined by my mother Mary 8 years later, and my brother Paul a few months after that. In his funeral homily I said that “The tremendous amount of good that my father accomplished was done with sincere and genuine humility. Whether he was painting a room, or plastering a roof before the rainy season, whether he was decorating a cake or weeding a garden, whether he was ironing a mountain of clothes or preparing a rabbit or a chicken for us to eat, he did everything with a sincere interest, sheer joy and a total commitment.  In one of the letters he used to write to me every week, precisely on the occasion of my parents' 50th Anniversary in 1998, I remember my dad writing to me that the best thing that ever happened to him was when he met my mother. . . . . they knew each other since they were very young, and got married young too, but the way they raised our family is nothing short of a masterpiece. I do not say this just to show off, but those who knew him well, know exactly what I mean.” 

My mother and father in 1982 in front of the World Trade Center, NY

But our father’s image changes over the years. Just reflect on this list of remarks one would make about our fathers at different stages of our lives.
4 years - “My daddy can do anything.”
7 years - “My dad knows a lot, a whole lot!”
8 years: “My dad does not know quite everything.”
12 years: “Oh well, my father naturally does not know that either!”
14 years: “Oh father? He is hopelessly old-fashioned.”
21 years: “Oh, that man - he is out of date!”
25 years: “He knows a little bit abut it, but not much.”
30 years: “I must find out what dad thinks about this.”
35 years: “Before we decide, let’s get dad’s opinion first.”
50 years: “What would dad have thought about this?”
60 years: “My dad knew literally everything!”
65 years: “I wish I could talk it over with dad once more.”

Let us remember them, and cherish the wealth of wisdom they shared with us over the years.